When Stability Dies, Truth is Born
We are addicted to "stable marriages" and "normal lives." But life isn't about stability; it's about revelation. Why your soulmate isn't the one who buys you diamonds, but the one who helps you wake u
“Humanity thirsts for love. True love. I am asking for the real thing. A real man. A real woman. Where are they?”
The “Real” Man or Woman
that we are looking for is not outside.
Outside... there are people on a journey, asking for exactly what you are asking for:
To meet a Real Person.
The Illusion of the “Couple Industry”
The couple world is thriving—matchmaking, dating apps, therapy.
Personally, as someone who specialized in marriage counseling and sat for hours in mediation, I found one common denominator:
Two people sit before me. Different or similar.
They met at a spiritual coordinate in time that birthed their connection.
Everything is from Heaven. No doubt.
We summon “chance” into existence.
The Purpose of Marriage
People are born to Change.
That is the Divine Essence.
We are born to know Who We Are.
The person who was right for me 20 years ago might be the right person for life, if he is a faithful partner in the journey of revelation.
But looking at life as a pre-written plan (Kindergarten $\rightarrow$ Army $\rightarrow$ Wedding $\rightarrow$ Mortgage $\rightarrow$ Death) is a Observation without Flight.
That is not Life. That is Culture.
The “Awake” Person (Me’orer)
A person who wakes up to Divinity—a Kabbalist, or simply an “Awake” person—looks at everything from a bird’s eye view.
He is not conditioned.
At the top of his priority list stands The Truth.
He weighs every event on a Spiritual Scale:
“What did this come to teach me? To expand me?”
Marriage as Brain Surgery
A brain surgeon does not hack at the skull. It is a delicate process.
So is spiritual work.
The awake person engages in “Surgery of the Spirit.”
He delves to the Root.
To the place where everything flows from the Infinite, not from his whims or needs.
The Patience of Teshuvah
In relationships, just like in Teshuvah (Repentance/Return), the answer comes from itself.
Without effort. Without hunting.
Divinity returns by itself to itself.
Awake people wait in love.
They do not force it.
They know in Da’at (Knowledge) that everything returns to its place.
The Cruelty of “Nu?”
Society lives in a constant “Nu?”:
“Nu, you didn’t get married?”
“Nu, what about kids?”
They nag us from the outside: “Do something! Be like everyone else so we can feel good!”
This is human cruelty.
Judgment that seeks to create a society that does not illuminate the human disturbance.
Marriage is Not Eating Strawberries
If anyone believes they get married and then go sit under a tree and eat strawberries—they are living in an illusion.
We enter the covenant of marriage to do our Correction (Tikun).
And we will do it in the best way possible.
Sometimes, “It’s not good for me” means: “I am currently growing, changing, evolving.”
And that is good. That is natural.
And sometimes... we are in a connection that brings us to a certain point, and from there we must continue “Alone.”
Because the “Together” no longer serves the purpose.
Life is not stability.
Life is everything except stability.
Because even the person I live next to is a changing being.
The Real Soulmate
There is a Divine Point—which is entering the Heart of the Creator.
When you hear the Truth telling you what to do, and you do it, you feel that You are the Truth.
That is the “Whole Person” we all want to know.
And yes, there is such a relationship.
It is not necessarily someone you dated 10 times or who bought you diamonds.
It is a person whom your Soul Knows.
Your soul delights in him, lives with him, and is vitalized by him—even if it has never met him.
This is a closeness that can sometimes take a lifetime.
Two people can lead ordinary lives, but deep inside, they have heard “The One.”
“Theirs.”
The one with whom they will make the journey Home and restore Divinity to its place.
These are Marriage.
People of Truth are very awake to this knowledge.
They live full lives of love, even if the love of their soul is currently elsewhere.
They know that The Creator Knows that they Know.
“When I go out toward You, I find You coming toward me.”
The more we step out of ourselves (our ego/needs), the closer we get to the Essence.
“This time, bone of my bones.”
Open your hearts to Love.
The One who hears the One—is the One.
There is no greater pleasure than this.
Reflect:
The “Nu”: Are you making life decisions to silence the “Nu” of society, or to answer the call of your Soul?
The Stability: Are you holding onto a relationship because it is “Stable” or because it is “True”? Stability is often just a comfortable coma.
The Knowing: Do you have a sense of a “Soulmate” that transcends your current reality? Don’t dismiss it as fantasy. It might be your soul’s GPS.